I come across quite a few cases where women continue to be in abusive relationships at the cost of their self-respect. In some cases I’ve even known them to go back to the same man yet again, forgetting the damage that was rendered to them, or their side of the family – leave alone, the humiliation that they themselves had to suffer.
Zehmat was at one such juncture in life. She was in a relationship with Ali, that the core of her being was telling her to walk out of, but she couldn’t break away. It was the big WHY that she was seeking an answer to. Her past life regression session brought out two rather similar and yet contrasting lives.
Life 1: A tall, pretty girl of about 21 on a boat, crossing some turbulent waters to meet someone. She was dressed like a royal and by the discomfort that she felt during the moment in trance, this was unfamiliar territory. She was the daughter of a Lord. The place felt like England in the 1860-70. The side that she was crossing over to was muddy, raw and had small trees with a lot of undergrowth. “I have been called here”, she said. As she waited, there appeared a woodcutter. The dark, good-looking man (Ali, from the present life) was also a serving member of the royal army. They had met at a fair a couple of months ago he had won a game for her. That was their moment and they found themselves in love. Though they both knew the gap in their social backgrounds, they continued to meet irrespective.
She was ready to put everything at stake for him, and so she was here. But all he had to say to her was, “It has to end, this would not work”, and upped and left. And that was it. From that moment, she attributed no significance to the ‘emotionally empty’ rest of her life. She chose to merely exist. Her dying thought of that lifetime at a really old age of 92/93 was the love that she felt for her children, but overall glad that she was leaving that life.
Life 2: A courtesan. Young, Beautiful with thick long black hair and a voluptuous body, she had eyes only for and on the King (Ali, of course). There were many others, but his eyes too, sought only her. The matters were not that simple, for the queen knew of this as the stories were doing rounds in the palace and the kingdom. Soon a decision arrived at her doorstep and she found herself thrown out of the kingdom. She was distraught, but a fighter she turned out to be. Instead of being torn and destroyed, she picked herself from the ground (literally and figuratively) and opened an ashram for helpless & homeless girls and kind of a dance school, taught them the ways of the world and took care of them.
The stark thing that emerged from both these recalls is the suffering at the hand of the man who stepped forward to love her, but lacked the courage to give her a respectful place in his life. The only thing that changed the outcome was the decision that SHE made for Herself.
… and on this note, I left Zehmat to take her own call, for she had found her answer. All she needed was an INNER Realization that – SHE CAN
– Nidhie
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