“A greedy man and an envious man met a king. The king said to them, “One of you may ask something of me, and I will give it to him, provided I give twice as much to the other.” The envious person did not want to ask first for he was envious of his companion who would receive twice as much, and the greedy man did not want to ask first since he wanted everything that was to be had. Finally the greedy one pressed the envious one to be the first to make the request. So the envious man asked the king to pluck out one of his eyes.”
Jewish Parable, The Seven Deadly Sins, Solomon Schimmel, 1992.
This is what Jealously looks likes. It not only destroys others, it completely ravages the person experiencing it.
So, what is Jealousy? When you see someone doing what you want to do, or someone has something you can’t possess, a fire rages within. You are filled with flames of desires and don’t know how to douse them. And then you feel contempt for other people, their success, their beauty, or maybe their popularity.
Jealousy thrives on insecurity, lack of trust in the process of life and your abilities. We suppress these feelings because they are uncomfortable, and no one wants to acknowledge Jealousy. It is considered to be a taboo subject and one of the five cardinal sins.
So finally, when the feeling of Jealousy strikes, you try to block it, pretend it is not there. Furthermore, Feeling of Jealousy gives the other person power over you, confirming their superiority, and who wants to provide the power to a person you scorn.
Everyone experiences Jealousy at some point or the other. Even the saints have had their share of experiencing Jealousy. So why do we try to deny this feeling? It is a feeling like any other feeling, and as with different feelings, the more you try to ignore them or not think about them more you end up thinking about them.
Jealousy is an indication that we need to look within, a sign that we need attention from ourselves. It has a spiritual meaning. When you leave Jealousy unattended, you amplify shame, guilt, stress, and feelings of inferiority.
Jealousy can teach us some lessons. Let us see what those lessons are:-
1.Jealousy makes us aware of our limiting beliefs
We see someone possessing what we want. We know we can’t have it because of specific reasons. Find out the reasons why can’t we have it? Is it because we feel we don’t have the capability, or does it not make a part of your priority list?
2. Jealousy introduces us to our deep-rooted fears
Every time you feel Jealous, ask yourself why am I feeling this way? What is this feeling bringing up for me? Jealousy helps us to discover our deep-rooted fears. Once we become aware of our fears, we can work on them. Sometimes just the knowledge empowers us.
3. Jealousy exposes our desires
When we see people getting things we desire, it sometimes tells us how much we want certain things. Sometimes it can impact us positively, helping us to work towards our goals and desires. In such circumstances, ask yourself? Is this something I need? Or am I merely being a slave to my desires?
4. Jealousy teaches us if others can do it, so can you
Seeing other people achieving what they want is proof enough that we can achieve it too. We need to open our eyes to the abundance in the Universe and claim what is rightfully ours.
5. Jealousy teaches us self love
Jealousy leads our self-love. Jealousy is a feeling of not being adequate. It’s good to be inspired by others but not at the cost of putting ourselves down. When we put ourselves through the agony of self-pity, we probably need to love ourselves the most.
6. Jealousy teaches us to celebrate the Universe
Jealousy shows us how to cultivate the feelings of real celebration. If you are jealous of another person’s success and find it hard to celebrate them truly, please ask yourself; What do I need to do to observe other people and their success.
People often pretend they don’t ever feel Jealous but secretly fight the battle. Jealousy is an emotion that needs loving attention and understanding, and living in denial can only make it worse. Let’s treat it like any other emotion and look within as this emotion also has the power to make us better human beings.
Vibha S Kapil